Right Royal Fools By Genevieve Frew

I thought this was a very good April Fool's day prank that was played upon the passengers aboard Cunard's Queen Elizabeth, whilst I was on board in 2012.

This is the notice that appeared in the daily bulletin on 1st April:


During our last bunkering operation in Singapore on the 24th March we took delivery of thousands of tons of contaminated heavy fuel oil. This fuel is unusable for our diesel electric motors and therefore until we reach Mumbai we need to use QUEEN ELIZABETH’s Gas Turbines.

These powerful auxiliary motors are normally only used to supplement our power and therefore we carry a limited supply of fuel for them. Fortunately due to their ecologically sound design we can use a variety of household and everyday items as potential fuel sources. The most effective of these is the lotic gas produced from the burning of suntan lotion. We need your help. We have a receptacle in the Grand Lobby on deck one and if everyone onboard donates a squirt of suntan lotion then we calculate that we will be able to produce enough lotic gas to power the Gas Turbines and help us reach Mumbai on time. Thank you for your support with this unusual situation – together we can ensure a timely arrival in Mumbai.

We need your suntan lotion

in Melbourne, Victoria, Australia


I love travel, but not so much on planes these days - I prefer to cruise and take my hotel with me to each new port. I love reading travel stories and, of course, love writing my own too. Enjoy.

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