The ending of my six year marriage finally arrived with a divorce being granted 13th October, spurred me onto thinking about “was is really love ”.
I can now do the things I really enjoy, like listening to my choice of music turned up loud while relaxing in a bath filled with beautiful relaxing fragrances and singing along with Rod Stewart to all those romantic songs, like; I Took One Look At You, Crazy In Love With You and most importantly Our Love Is Here To Stay.
It wasn't until I heard these songs that I knew that the 'falling in love' part of our relationship was missing, sad but true. It took me twelve years in a tempestuous relationship to finally agree to getting married, why I still don't know, perhaps there was some pity attached to my decision as my partner lived in his place and I in mine, however due to him having a triple by-pass heart surgery and not coping, I suggested he live with me, wrong decision!
I cared too much for him, but complications related to his recreational drug taking prohibited me from making a commitment for twelve years. Our relationship was and ‘on and off' one due to his mood swings, which sometimes scared me. However being away from him made me unhappy and it was myself patching up the difficulties and going back to him, big mistake.
If it isn't a good relationship don't go there especially with a marriage. Shame that I didn't take my own advice.