Lies By Christopher Jordan

I was drunk in an ally, talking to a group of people, when a guy came up to me and said, "I'm sure I know you from somewhere."

I said, "Aye, I'm a bit famous."

He said, "Oh really?" (Not impressed)

I said, "Aye, I was in Friends.

He said, "AYE?!" (Impressed)

I said, "Aye, ya know that episode where Ross is dating his student?"

He said, "Aye!"

I said, "And you know how her dad shows up and thinks Ross is too old for her?"

He said, "AYE!"

I said, "I was her dad."

He paused... and said, "That's Bruce Willis."

I said, "Aye, I'm Bruce Willis."

(I'm not really Bruce Willis.)


in Edinburgh, United Kingdom

 1,264

What Christopher looks like.

BE WARNED! My views and opinions are not for everyone. You should avoid reading anything I write if you respect religion, tolerance, sobriety or general human decency.

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