Big Dan (explicit) By Christopher Jordan

Big Dan man. Where do I start. Right, there's this guy, and his name's Big Dan. ...Nah, that's a terrible place to start. Sorry, right... em... Back in the myspace days, I knew this underground porn chick from town who did webcam shows, and long story short, on a night my buds were over, she linked me to one of her paid cam shows for free.

Now, she broadcasts from her living room, does all the usual sexy, depressing shit, tit-rapes herself, etc... ...and there's this guy on the sofa beside her. Big Dan, real name. A sort of wee average dude, short hair. He's sitting in his boxers, slumped in the sofa, watching TV and munching cereal. Total Sunday night mode.

"Who's that?" asked my pal Jan via keyboard. "Big Dan", she replied and she turned, chebbies bouncing all over the place, and tapped him on the shoulder. And Big Dan turns, with a mouth full of cheerios or wheetos or whatever, stares blankly at the webcam for a few seconds, and his eyes light up like he just realized he left his wallet on the bus.

Now, I'd be lying if I said I'm 'sure' this is what happened, 'cause there was no audio, but I THINK what happened in that moment, he was realizing for the first time that his live in busty buddy was in fact, a camera artist, and all the while, he's been eating cereal in the back.

I still remember that face to this day, frozen with a face full of cereal.

in Edinburgh, United Kingdom


BE WARNED! My views and opinions are not for everyone. You should avoid reading anything I write if you respect religion, tolerance, sobriety or general human decency.

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