BBW Escort By Christopher Jordan

The Fringe Festival is the biggest performing arts festival in the world, and it's right on my doorstep. I get to see some of the weirdest people ever conducting fucked-up shows and bizarre stand-up acts. It's a surreal experience once the alcohol kicks in.

Last year and this year I saw a BBW Escort (tubby hooker) do a show about her life as a sex worker. She talked about peeing and face-sitting and how her niche as a plus-size prostitute earned her all the sensitive, submissive clientele. No troubles there, no dreadful pimps, no sex attacks.

Then she mentioned 'The Swedish Model', which is some stupid law that states women are to be prosecuted for slinging gash, which in turn means they can't report sex attackers without penalization (like a traffic ticket for screwing wealthy people).

...so I laughed. Because who the fuck else are sex attackers going to attack? Lollypop ladies?!

Well, she just got pissed! She singled me outta the crowd. The flames of hate danced in her eyes, and I apologized to avoid being knifed or beaten up by a pimp.

The moral of the story (if you can call it moral) is, if you're gonna pay a prostitute, pay a skinny, sickly looking one to fuck, and not a chubby feminist one to talk.


in Edinburgh, United Kingdom

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BE WARNED! My views and opinions are not for everyone. You should avoid reading anything I write if you respect religion, tolerance, sobriety or general human decency.

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