bytestories by Jennifer BurkeLatest stories by Jennifer Burke on www.bytestories.comuuid:843ac02f-7712-47dd-9a87-fd1dd2068135;id=1292024-03-29T00:23:22Z908d7c23-88c3-4e19-8d9d-9ea69a5d90b4Offline Dating2015-05-30T00:43:50+01:00Jennifer Burkehttp://www.bytestories.com/author/Jennifer.Burkeauthor+Jennifer.Burke@bytestories.comI thought taking risks was counter-productive cuz it felt counter-intuitive & was as good as auditioning for MasterChef when all you know how to cook is meth....0d5c6842-c08b-4797-93a4-10d387c0089bNo Speak English2014-06-28T13:04:24+01:00Jennifer Burkehttp://www.bytestories.com/author/Jennifer.Burkeauthor+Jennifer.Burke@bytestories.comMy inability to string 2 words together or construct a legitimate sentence whilst talking to a woman I’m royally attracted to, appears to be my own p...e5d1ce33-91e7-4c0c-bcad-ed8db7e05015I Hate You. Period. 2013-09-20T16:10:36+01:00Jennifer Burkehttp://www.bytestories.com/author/Jennifer.Burkeauthor+Jennifer.Burke@bytestories.comI wrote a song once called "I Hate You, Period"… but everyone thought I was singing the full stop. So I changed it to "I Hate Menses", so now it soun...91130be4-56c6-4654-abeb-c858f06fe4a1Replacing Sex With a Stiff One2013-07-14T17:30:29+01:00Jennifer Burkehttp://www.bytestories.com/author/Jennifer.Burkeauthor+Jennifer.Burke@bytestories.comI once had a woman tell me that since her divorce she’d replaced sex with booze, which meant she was now getting trashed once a year....93ee281a-6418-4b6e-a9c4-f9af3db1eb71Selfies2013-05-27T15:50:56+01:00Jennifer Burkehttp://www.bytestories.com/author/Jennifer.Burkeauthor+Jennifer.Burke@bytestories.comSo selfies are fun, hey guys!? Like going to the movies alone, or stalking yourself... or crying while you masturbate. That kind of fun. ...4c5be5cf-87bc-427a-8c32-39b48b59cd33Coming Out2013-05-04T15:10:37+01:00Jennifer Burkehttp://www.bytestories.com/author/Jennifer.Burkeauthor+Jennifer.Burke@bytestories.comEver since I can remember I’ve been attracted to women, mostly cuz guys just put up less of a struggle....0f2a0435-1096-4453-b50e-78fb7ebc7ee9Not Quite Right2013-04-08T12:28:51+01:00Jennifer Burkehttp://www.bytestories.com/author/Jennifer.Burkeauthor+Jennifer.Burke@bytestories.comI tried a bucket bong at a party one night, & for hours I thought I could hear voices in my head; so I started an acapella group... obviously. But then people just thought I had Tourettes....771bca77-3bda-48b7-82c3-88c77821fb52Puberty Bloobs2013-03-26T06:08:39ZJennifer Burkehttp://www.bytestories.com/author/Jennifer.Burkeauthor+Jennifer.Burke@bytestories.comPuberty was quite hard for me, I was literally flatter than a pancake for what seemed like an eternity....5b02ba06-2ff8-447f-961f-d63ee4c69bbdNine Months of Rehab2013-03-11T06:29:03ZJennifer Burkehttp://www.bytestories.com/author/Jennifer.Burkeauthor+Jennifer.Burke@bytestories.comSo sometimes I'll go to the chemist & pick myself up a pregnancy test just so people think I have a sex life, or maybe the morning after pill... but not at the same time #awkward...6152068b-e619-42b2-8475-47a599cd9650Gay Arguments2013-02-27T01:45:38ZJennifer Burkehttp://www.bytestories.com/author/Jennifer.Burkeauthor+Jennifer.Burke@bytestories.comBeing in a relationship with another woman can have it perks, like borrowing clothes, no pash rashes & having a good long chat about tampon texture w...7ff6d305-95cb-4634-9e96-842cdfbfbce6Celebrity Kids2013-02-19T04:23:46ZJennifer Burkehttp://www.bytestories.com/author/Jennifer.Burkeauthor+Jennifer.Burke@bytestories.comI've noticed celebrity kids seem to be ageing somewhat faster than the rest of us; one minute they’re a new born on the cover of New Idea....25c36bb0-179d-4cec-acd1-015e6ae0508eThe Personality Smear2013-02-06T08:08:38ZJennifer Burkehttp://www.bytestories.com/author/Jennifer.Burkeauthor+Jennifer.Burke@bytestories.comIt should be compulsory to regularly test for personality abnormalities; this might help to solve the riddle of the arctic weather conditions that ha...7284cdf8-4716-4a95-a617-7a156f1ba8adShow Us Ya Tits2013-02-06T06:53:30ZJennifer Burkehttp://www.bytestories.com/author/Jennifer.Burkeauthor+Jennifer.Burke@bytestories.comDon’t you hate it when guys drive along & yell out, “Show us ya tits!”… but they don’t stop? Fellaaazz… I need more time! ...